Going to have a bit of a vent here:
💫 Currently surviving on very minimal sleep and its been an on going thing. . Adding into that mix I’ve been diagnosed with extreemly low levels of iron and possibly need iv transfusions..
😨My 2 year old daughter sleeps now from 8pm to 930pm then its party time until I can eventually get her back to sleep at the wee hours in the morning… omg whoever said toddlers not sleeping during the day instead all through the night has been sugar coating..
😥 I feel like a walking corpse at most times and im not one to whinge… but I really feel I’m close to breaking point. ..
😤 i ended up having my right carpul tunnel surgery done and found out that I had shattered my wrist… that was back in early march and my hand/wrist is still trying to mend…
Ok so today i have been on my hands and knees scrubbing everything in our old house armed with gloves, hard ass bleach and other chemicals..
So when i hand the keys back for that house i will recieve a full bond refund.. considering i paid the total bond plus 3 weeks rent at our new place.. i need the refund..
Problem is that i feel so underappreciated by how much effort and hard work I’ve done for moving an entire house into our new one pretty much by myself and I’m now cleaning up the mess. I spent most of the day scrubbing like cinderella and still no one says even a thank you… I seriously feel a total crash and burn coming as I’ve only been able to sleep 30mins each night for the past few months… i want to scream at my parents in a verbal tyrant and so deservingly tell them im not their bloody slave..
So I’ve not been able to get on and post anything for a while. Its been a tad crazy with both my kids being sick, I had a major crash and burn health wise and also my mum has been in these really crap high and low moods ie: happy one minute then being a total asshole the next. It’s really put pressure on the house emotionally and I have had to hold my tounge so many times I feel like a big verbal explosion of hateful truths will be spewed out of my mouth and she wont like it one bit of it. I honestly can’t understand the logical thought process of someone thinking it’s ok to be a total ass on all levels and then the next minute showering happy glittering fairy dust everywhere. When this happens oh my god she makes everyone around her feel like a monsterous blackhole as just engulfed everyone and everything surrounding her. It’s her pattern and I’ve had to deal with her feral mood patterns all my life. I wish she was honest with herself and told the doctors the truth on her mood rollercoaster but within saying that: how can she state the truth when she can’t see her destructive learned behaviour. Honeslty if she did or the the doctor asked me about her behaviours then I would be blunt and honest as anyone could possibly be… I whole heartily grantee that she would be diagnosed with either; bipolar or manic depression and put on medications. It genuinely sucks to be around someone like this who won’t get help, who keep taking their feral moods out on everyone around them, in turn dragging everyone down with them. My only point of venting my complete frustration of her is here. Argh… I honestly feel like im pulling my hair out whilst banging my face against a brick wall…